Are You Present in Your Parenting?
Are You Present in Your Parenting?
Are You Present in Your Parenting?
Present Parenting. It's incredibly powerful.
We, meaning millennials and Gen X’s, are in the throws of figuring out this parenting thing along with a digital world. I don’t know about you, but a cell phone is always around and the instant gratification of being able to order something the second I think of it, research something the moment I have a question, or get lost in the land of scrolling is always a fingertip away.
And maybe our kids are doing the same thing, and if not, they sure are learning.
Take the devices away and ask yourself if you’re present. It’s easy to put them down… kinda. But then the next hurdle is being truly present, not just physically in a room.
You know when you hop in your car and get to where you need to go, but when you arrive you realize you have no recollection of how you got there? This is how we are parenting… for the most part anyway.
And I have found that when I am able to truly stay intentional in how I show up in parenting, being mindful and present creates a completely different experience for both me and my kids.
This is how I do it.
1. Put your phone down. Have phone time, and have kid time. Don't mix the two.
2. Wake up before them. This is going to be easier for some and look different for all. But wake up on your time, not their time.
3. Get them down early. If you can. Again, this is going to be easier for some and look different for all. Having your own time to unwind is crucial. If it's not possible, take turns with your significant other if you have the option.
4. Take stills with your mind. Again, put your phone down. They don't need it in their face all the time. Take the moment in through your eyes and your mind. Capture the moments right in front of you.
5. Schedule one on one time with each kid. Create little date nights or date days. Don't overcomplicate it.
6. Play. Be playful. Redirect with play. Default to play. Ground yourself with play. We have time. I promise.
7. Eat and exercise. We can't be present without fuel.
If I read this list 4 years ago I'd have some select, choice words with a heavy serving of sarcasm.
You know why? Because I was completely burnt out, wasn't taking care of myself and had a shitty mindset. So, if you're responding like that, it's totally okay. I see you. I was you.
Start with a small action. Pick one thing, do it small. But start. Things take time to change, but nothing changes if nothing changes.